Let’s dive into this more in life when I was broke.
I was told most my life I was a failure, destined to be broke. I felt I wasdoing the thing all wrong by those who were supposed to be the closest to me, that I was not going anywhere. My parents, the ones who are supposed to make me feel safe, protected and loved made me feel insecure, worthless and stupid. I tried going to college…. three times, in fact.
I got told that I should stick it out and make sure I get a college degree because some people were “worried” about my future. “You’ll never make it far if you don’t have a degree,” they said. I didn’t fit the typical finish high school, graduate college speech. Nor did I want to. If everyone is wearing black I want to be the girl who is wearing blue.
“You Are Lucky”
People see your success, the things you have and how you present yourself and typically think one of two things. One, your parents paid for everything and you had just the best childhood ever. Two, they will say the word that every successful entrepreneur will cringe at, “you are lucky”. No actually, all you see is my glory and not my story.
I remember sitting in the floor like it was last night, I was just about to poke him on the shoulder to wake him up to confront him about the text I had seen on his phone from earlier, from another girl. Now wait before you go throwing judgments, I had done the same thing a few months prior, and he had caught me. I was over this cycle and at the end of the rope, desperate and so ready to either fight for us or part our ways.
At a very young age, I had to try to seek approval to feel worthy. This included how I looked, what I was doing to further my education, or how I felt I needed to feel loved. This was a new norm for me and when I knew my husband and I had lost any connection we had besides our son, I knew I had to fight for us.
Broke to a Successful Entrepreneur?
“I will never live another day like this,” something I told myself often. We would go days without a decent conversation and I had no money (we had no money) but I would try to find coins or dig up things I could return for some extra cash, just to keep from having to ask him for anything. I would go weeks making meals off of what I could, to keep me from having to go to the store.
What does any of this have to do with being a successful entrepreneur? It has everything to do with where I am today. See, the thing is, I never knew God intimately until I was 28. We get into this mindset that whatever season we are in that it will be that way forever and I am here to tell you, NO YOU WON’T.
You can take your experiences in this life and use them to your advantage. You can change your life the moment you decide to not give up. God had me the whole time in His arms and I didn’t even know it. I stayed consistent and I stayed focused on the path ahead. It was all I had at this point.
I decided I wasn’t going to give up and be broke forever, but that I was going to fight.
Yes, I was 28 when I moved in with my husband. I was 30 when I opened my first business. I was 32 when I “retired” from my full-time bartending job & paid off $100,000 in debt. All from a girl who grew up in a trailer park (not that they are bad but mine was) & came from no money.
My words of advice for today is this, you will only ever be as successful as you want to be. When things don’t work the way you thought they would and broke when you try something else. Focus your eyes on Jesus when you experience rejection or failure. He knows the plans He has for you.
God Takes Us to Places We Never Expected
It doesn’t matter how old or young you are God has something different in mind for you. Something better. When you have God’s anointing in your life He will take you to places you could never go on your own. He will supply you the knowledge, resources, mentors for every step of the way.
I could have easily let my past dictate my future. I could have let the resources and money I didn’t have at the time keep me from moving forward. My friends, what it takes is belief. You have to believe with your whole heart that you can do whatever it is that you are setting out to do. When you start to believe you will become an unstoppable force. I promise that.